Work Etiquette

I have spent too much time in the corporate environment, and now is my time to call out all the nasties.

You, yes you douchebag. The one who decides to use the bathroom at work, knowing full well your insides are liquified and you will release the smell of death. I loathe you. Why can I not have the opportunity to pee in the bathroom w/out my gag reflex kicking in? You know full well your dietary habits are atrocious, yet you feel compelled to share with others. Is it b/c your overweight goth girlfriend is coming over later and you don't want her to know the secret of how disgusting of a human being you have become? Save your disease riddled waste for your own home.

And you, yes you, corporate go-getter. You must be far too busy to actually sit and wait for your HotPocket to finish in the microwave. Oh, no, you should just set that timer for a minute and a half and walk away. Off to do the bidding of your corporate puppetmasters. Good monkey. Good. Meanwhile, I have to take your magma-like HotPocket out of the microwave, recieve second degree burns whilst doing so, simply so I can heat something up. You dont deserve to eat. You dont derserve to wipe Clay Aiken's ass. Maybe you are the same person I am referencing above..you with your HotPocket and blackened, cancer-ridden insides.