Work Etiquette

I have spent too much time in the corporate environment, and now is my time to call out all the nasties.

You, yes you douchebag. The one who decides to use the bathroom at work, knowing full well your insides are liquified and you will release the smell of death. I loathe you. Why can I not have the opportunity to pee in the bathroom w/out my gag reflex kicking in? You know full well your dietary habits are atrocious, yet you feel compelled to share with others. Is it b/c your overweight goth girlfriend is coming over later and you don't want her to know the secret of how disgusting of a human being you have become? Save your disease riddled waste for your own home.

And you, yes you, corporate go-getter. You must be far too busy to actually sit and wait for your HotPocket to finish in the microwave. Oh, no, you should just set that timer for a minute and a half and walk away. Off to do the bidding of your corporate puppetmasters. Good monkey. Good. Meanwhile, I have to take your magma-like HotPocket out of the microwave, recieve second degree burns whilst doing so, simply so I can heat something up. You dont deserve to eat. You dont derserve to wipe Clay Aiken's ass. Maybe you are the same person I am referencing above..you with your HotPocket and blackened, cancer-ridden insides.

Sorry about the lack of creativity with the title. My creativity has been sucked out of me and forced into an unknown part of my lymbic system. So, I have been working...and working...and working. You know when the old guys tell you that work is good for you? That it gives you character? Well, the folks telling you that have no character. They are mediocre has-beens making excuses for a $7 job shovelling manure. I'd prefer to be chillin at home with the family. Or on the golf course.

Kids and wife are good. We still want to move to Seattle. This area is nice, but it doesnt feel like "home". We shall bide our time here then move on again. So, whats going on with you? How have you been. How many other bloggers do you know that break the 4th wall?